In April, Lisa Torres got engaged to her boyfriend, Alex Cortes. Torres has revealed she sent a bridesmaid proposal box to her bridals to prepare for the wedding, which featured a two-page letter. In a now-viral clip, the auditor from San Antonio explained that the letter outlined her bridesmaids’ duties, which included time and money commitments.
Lisa Torres, 29, got engaged to her boyfriend, Alex Cortes, in April 2021.
The auditor sent out a letter of mandatory/non-mandatory commiitments to prepare for the wedding.
Being transparent, Lisa, 29, even offered an option to say ‘No’ if they didn’t feel comfortable. “I am going to share a tip that I used to be more transparent with my bridal party,” Torres said in one video shared on June 6th. In a separate video on June 7th, she shared a close-up look at the letter, which detailed mandatory commitments, including a bachelorette trip and rehearsal dinner.
Torres’s letter, which offered option No, including guidelines and expectations, has gone viral on TikTok.
@lisalovesrandom##stitch with @stephanieberman7 I was scared to have a ##transparency letter in the ##bridesmaidproposalbox but it WORKED OUT. ##wedding ##weddingtiktok
The letter also detailed non-mandatory commitments, which include wedding dress shopping and bridal shower. Torres shared her preferred color of bridesmaids’ dresses – dusty rose and concepts for her bachelorette party, which she wrote she would like to have at an all-inclusive resort in Mexico. The estimated cost for the bridesmaids’ dresses was benched at $200 each, and the trip was expected to cost $500 per person.
Torres’ estimated cost for her bridesmaids’ dresses (dusty rose) was pegged at $200 each.
While her bachelorette trip was expected to cost $500 per person.
“I’ve known several people that had complaints about being in a wedding party. All of those complaints seemed to stem from a lack of clarity from the onset. This is why I wanted to be as transparent as possible.” Torres told BuzzFeed. She explained that she decided to share the letter on TikTok because she wants to normalize the concept of being transparent and allowing people to decline to be part of a wedding party.
@lisalovesrandomReply to @silly16boo Your ##transparencyletterMay look different, that’s okay. We envision different things. ##wedding ##weddingtiktok ##bridesmaids
Torres also included a series of FAQs on the back for her letter.
She added: “It’s important to destigmatize the discussion around the cost and expectations of being a bridesmaid. It was so heartbreaking to see how many stories there were in the comments about friendships ending because this important discussion didn’t happen beforehand.” Eventually, one of Torres’ potential bridesmaids did take her up on the No offer, and Yes, they’re still good friends.
Many people have commented, saying it’s was a “mature” way to ease the stress of joining a bridal party.
While people’s focus has remained on her letter, Torres told BuzzFeed that she hopes people look at the bigger picture, which signals that “transparency is the best policy and to normalize allowing people to say no to being part of a wedding party. Many people don’t learn about the wedding industry’s expectations until they’re experiencing it. It’s good to be aware.”
Torres’s aim for sharing the letter was to “normalize the concept of being transparent.”
If you would agree? She has makes a great point!
In the United States, bridesmaids are expected to fund their dress, travel, and even cover the cost of the bachelorette party. According to Wedding Wire, the average price of being a bridesmaid is estimated at over $1000. However, what are your thoughts on sending out a letter of guidelines and expectations to bridesmaids?